Relationship 101
What do I know about love and relationships? What do I have to say? I've never been in a monogamous relationship... Having said that, I do have some ideas, feelings, opinions about what makes for a good relationship. Or should I say, I have ideas about what I would like my relationship to be. This is my relationship 101 and I wrote a bitter poem recently that sort of gives you an idea of how I feel about couple's in relationships:
Those People
Couples get lazy
In their day's
Together
Or apart
Where they can't even
Put their hands
On one another's
Heart
Just to say
I love you
Just the way you are
Where one
Gazes
Into the other's
Eye's
Just because
Where you
Make love
Every other day; at least
And on tuesday
Because it feels
So good
If you ask me
Couples are wasted
On Couples
The funny thing is I wrote that poem about a month ago and there is clearly some bitterness toward the end of it. A month ago I was lonely and very, very single. I am currently sharing my time with an amazing woman; we're getting to know each other - one day at a time. I do believe that relationships take effort, but loving someone should be effortless. I don't want to be lazy in a relationship. i.e. I no longer shave my legs and armpits. I stop lighting candles. I don't have dinner on the table anymore. I stop saying how sexy and totally awesome she is. I get impatient when she has to work late. And so on... That's why I say it takes lots of effort to not fall into the habit of taking my love for granted.
My goal in a relationship is to be honest, loving and attentive. And to remember that making love is not a chore. It's a gift and a blessing and a pleasure. I do realize that it's not always easy. Mary has paid you your monthly visit and you feel fat and have cramps and just want to have your belly rubbed. The thought of cooking dinner in that state seems insurmountable. You want to be with someone who understands when you just can't rise to the occasion today and picks up the slack. I believe that having common interests and beliefs are important to having a lasting relationship. I believe that trust is important. Patience and honoring where your partner is in the moment is vital. Communication is key as well.
Ultimately, it's your own journey coupled with your journey with another. Opposites can attract; you can find a way to balance each other out. You don't have to have everything in common; that would be boring. And besides you want to be with someone where you can learn something new from each other. But again, common beliefs and interests are important. We have to lift each other up, support each other, be a champion and cheerleader for your mate! Show your partner the same kindness, patience and tolerance you would bestow to anyone who's important to you in your life. It's not easy, but it's doable. I just know that I will do whatever it takes to keep the passion, excitement and spark alive in my relationship. I desire a monogamous partnership where the possibilities are limitless and the love is an ever blossoming flower. I want a wife and children, I want a family of my own one day. I believe in the love of God, family, friends, the human race and not lastly, but just as important, I believe in a loving partnership, a lasting relationship, a journey of a lifetime.... But first, I must love myself.
Those People
Couples get lazy
In their day's
Together
Or apart
Where they can't even
Put their hands
On one another's
Heart
Just to say
I love you
Just the way you are
Where one
Gazes
Into the other's
Eye's
Just because
Where you
Make love
Every other day; at least
And on tuesday
Because it feels
So good
If you ask me
Couples are wasted
On Couples
The funny thing is I wrote that poem about a month ago and there is clearly some bitterness toward the end of it. A month ago I was lonely and very, very single. I am currently sharing my time with an amazing woman; we're getting to know each other - one day at a time. I do believe that relationships take effort, but loving someone should be effortless. I don't want to be lazy in a relationship. i.e. I no longer shave my legs and armpits. I stop lighting candles. I don't have dinner on the table anymore. I stop saying how sexy and totally awesome she is. I get impatient when she has to work late. And so on... That's why I say it takes lots of effort to not fall into the habit of taking my love for granted.
My goal in a relationship is to be honest, loving and attentive. And to remember that making love is not a chore. It's a gift and a blessing and a pleasure. I do realize that it's not always easy. Mary has paid you your monthly visit and you feel fat and have cramps and just want to have your belly rubbed. The thought of cooking dinner in that state seems insurmountable. You want to be with someone who understands when you just can't rise to the occasion today and picks up the slack. I believe that having common interests and beliefs are important to having a lasting relationship. I believe that trust is important. Patience and honoring where your partner is in the moment is vital. Communication is key as well.
Ultimately, it's your own journey coupled with your journey with another. Opposites can attract; you can find a way to balance each other out. You don't have to have everything in common; that would be boring. And besides you want to be with someone where you can learn something new from each other. But again, common beliefs and interests are important. We have to lift each other up, support each other, be a champion and cheerleader for your mate! Show your partner the same kindness, patience and tolerance you would bestow to anyone who's important to you in your life. It's not easy, but it's doable. I just know that I will do whatever it takes to keep the passion, excitement and spark alive in my relationship. I desire a monogamous partnership where the possibilities are limitless and the love is an ever blossoming flower. I want a wife and children, I want a family of my own one day. I believe in the love of God, family, friends, the human race and not lastly, but just as important, I believe in a loving partnership, a lasting relationship, a journey of a lifetime.... But first, I must love myself.
Comments
Post a Comment